Fear of being free...

When i watch a bird gliding on a thermal, effortless and free
i long to be up there, to be that bird
and yet i am also afraid
afraid that, once i notice i am flying,
i will crash to the ground
or will pass out from vertigo.

Being free - what does that mean to the bird?
Free to choose its life?
Free to be all that it is designed to be?
Free from fear?

As i spend this semester studying ethics
i am contemplating what is important
- to me, to us, to the universe
and who or what i'm responding to
when i choose to act or not...

I think that i am free to be myself (but not to be a bird)
i am not free from fear (though Twelve Step programmes say i should be able to replace fear with faith)
but i am free to choose how i respond to moments of fear
how i react to feelings of fear
and then perhaps i will learn to use the key to unlock my inner wings and fly...